In August 2016, David agrees to Dr. Warner's unethical form of therapy consisting of delving into the past and artist dates. Reflecting on the year he turned sixteen, David discovers he had the God-given talent, determination, and a once-in-a-life time opportunity. Several things stood between him and a gold medal at the 1979 World Games Diving Championships, in Tønsberg, Norway: his age, inexperience, family's secrets, and finances.
The springboard finals find David leading the best divers in the world, but shadows of his past try to derail his competitive psyche. With each dive, David must silence the voices in his head to perform a near-perfect final dive and change his life forever.
Returning home to Aulden, Ohio, David is faced with the reality that people aren't what they seem. During a celebration at the White House, President Carter announces that the USA will boycott the 1980 Olympic Games. Upon the disappointment, David accepts a scholarship to prepare for the 1984 Games in Los Angeles, and a possible boyfriend.
Cracked Surface is the sequel to Surface Tension and continues exploring my personal struggle with the desire to lead a “normal” life through the eyes of David Mathew. In Surface Tension, David is sixteen years old, represents the USA, and wins the gold medal at the 1979 World Springboard and Platform Diving Championships in Tønsberg, Norway. David has a secret. In spite of his unprecedented victory, he attempts to hide his tumultuous journey of grooming, manipulation, coercion, and sexual abuse by coaches, benefactors, and medical team he trusted. With his dreams of Olympic glory put on hiatus due to President Carter’s boycott of the 1980 Summer Olympic Games in Moscow, Russia, David relocates to California to focus on the 1984 Olympics. Cracked Surface continues with David attending the University of California as a pre-med major on academic and athletic scholarships. An encounter with Jennifer, a sorority pledge and theatre major, leads David to help with her audition for the fall play. David gets a part in The Visit of the Old Lady, a lead role in Single Parents a Movie of the Week, and an extra role on ABC’s General Hospital. David’s hopes for normalcy shatter when he finds himself in a clinic and cannot remember where or what had happened the previous evening. Shame and guilt engulf him as he tries to suppress his secret, but at the NCAA Qualifying Diving meet, David blacks out. Without time to put the pieces together, he steps away from school and diving and returns to the farm in Aulden, Ohio to recuperate. While regaining his strength in Aulden, David’s decides to take a year off and attend Wright State University’s Theatre Department to develop his acting and dancing talents, reinvent himself, and explore his spirituality before returning to Hollywood. Cracked Surface demonstrates the struggles and challenges sexually abused people endure as they try to live a normal life. My story of being a sixteen-year-old elite athlete passed around was only the beginning of a lifelong struggle with PTSD, depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts. One-in-six males are sexually abused before the age of eighteen. The recent allegations brought against the US Gymnastic and other sporting entities have shed some light on this growing epidemic, but male athletes have been sexually abused for many years and are still in hiding because of societal beliefs that it is just hazing, initiation, the rite of passage, or they myth "males can't be sexually abused." Sexual abuse is only the springboard; the effects may not become evident or recognized until much later in life. By sharing my story, I hope to shed some light on how a sexually abused person attempts to reinvent, adapt, and assimilate to fit into society—but are never able to escape the deep seeded pain without facing the past and finding their true self.
“I am grateful to Jennifer Sey for sharing such an honest account of her experiences as an elite gymnast. She has eloquently and fairly exposed a dark side to our sport that parents have long needed to be made aware of.”
—Dominique Moceanu, Olympic Gold Medal Winning Gymnast
Fanciful dreams of becoming the next Nadia Comaneci led Jennifer Sey to become a gymnast at the age of six. Her early success propelled her family to sacrifice everything to help her become, by age 11, one of America’s elite. But as she set her sights higher and higher, Jennifer began to change, setting her needs, her health, and her well-being aside in the name of winning. And the adults in her life refused to notice her downward spiral.
We are born into the school of life. Everything that happens, big and small, soft and hard is a lesson about who we are and how the world works. Once we leave home, it is necessary to reexamine those lessons and the conclusions that we took from them. Only then can we begin to separate from who we were told we were supposed to be and find out who we truly are.
FTT is a guide to both begin to question and to take some deep hard looks at those conclusions that control how you see the world. It is both validating and confronting while supporting you in uncovering, processing and freeing yourself from ideal, belief's, perspectives and absolute facts that don't work for you anymore. Only then can you create the possibility of knowing you and finding a deep, lasting happiness.
Too much of life is about running from the pain of the past and present. If you are ready to stop or at least consider stop running, then you are ready for Facing the Truth of Your Life.
Someone in your past sold you a false story about who you are and what you’re worth. It has been holding you back for too long. Take control of your future.
A staggering one out of three women in America was a victim of sexual abuse at some point in her childhood. No matter how many years it’s been, if that’s your story, those scars are probably still with you. But even if that’s not part of your story, this book is for you. Women today have been groomed for a lot more than just sex.
Using her own story of abuse, family tragedy, and rebellion, Elizabeth Melendez Fisher guides readers toward an understanding that grooming is oftentimes subtle, but it’s always life-altering. In Groomed Fisher incorporates the language and lessons gained over the past decade working with sex trafficking victims and her work in ministry and counseling before that. She draws out five specific ways that women have been groomed, from physical appearance to spirituality to finances, and shows how those manipulative messages have affected the way we see our worth and how they’ve oftentimes stifled and limited us. From there Fisher offers readers a way to overcome their past, starting with the all-important but rarely explored idea of a selah, or a time of rest and reflection, and exploring active ways to forgive and move forward to a new level of freedom.
No one has to be defined by her past. No one has to live for her groomers. It’s time to take a look back at where we came from to escape the messages of our past and take control of our future.
In this raw, unflinching look at how his dream of playing hockey was stolen from him by charismatic hockey coach and sexual predator Graham James, Greg Gilhooly describes in anguishing detail the mental torment he suffered both during and long after the abuse and the terrible reality behind the sanitized term “sexual assault.” Although James has been convicted of sexually assaulting some of his victims, including Sheldon Kennedy and Theo Fleury, he neither confessed in court nor was convicted of sexually assaulting many of his other victims, including Gilhooly, depriving him of the judicial closure he craved.
Recent events such as the clergy abuse scandal in the Catholic Church have brought the once-taboo subject of childhood sexual abuse to the forefront. But despite increasing awareness of the problem, the United States has not succeeded in establishing effective means of deterring and preventing it, leaving the children of today and tomorrow vulnerable. Hamilton proposes a comprehensive yet simple solution: eliminate the arbitrary statutes of limitation for childhood sexual abuse so that survivors past and present can get into court. Removing this merely procedural barrier permits the millions of survivors to make public the identities of their perpetrators and to receive justice and much-deserved compensation. Standing in the way, however, are formidable opponents such as the insurance industry and the hierarchy of the Roman Catholic Church. In Justice Denied, Hamilton predicts a coming civil rights movement for children and explains why it is in the interest of all Americans to allow victims of childhood sexual abuse this chance to seek justice when they are ready.
Male sexual abuse occurs far more commonly than previously suspected, yet too few victims ever seek support. Countless remain silent. They cope through avoidance, isolation, substance abuse, hyper-masculinity, etc.
Men Too: Unspoken Truths About Male Sexual Abuse is for male survivors and their supporters. It is an educational, heart-wrenching look at 13 male sexual abuse victims experience, written from the perspective of a retired police officer and registered psychologist.
Using their narrative accounts Dr. Palfy offers:
Conversations about male sexual abuse need to increase. Men Too highlights the complex and unique barriers boys and men face during and after abuse. Help put them on the road to recovery.
I give this book 5 Stars
Dr. Kelli Palfy breaks the myth, "males can't be sexually abused." One in six males experience sexual abuse before the age of eighteen is the current statistic, but Palfy illustrates that this data is most likely not accurate or current. Society and the expectations of being a man have kept many men silent about their abuse, which has provided predators to prey successfully on male victims and get away with it. Palfy shares thirteen male sexual abuse victims' stories and carefully identifies and explains the diagnoses for the reader to understand and comprehend. Palfy's approach to the material and stories are transparent and filled with empathy and support for the victims, and this translates to the readers. Palfy's book is valuable for parents and people who support sexually abused male victims. As a survivor of sexual abuse myself, I highly recommend that everyone read this book.
Kathy fell into her sister’s embrace in the Advocate Illinois Masonic Hospital lobby in Chicago. “Just give me the road,” she whispered into the safety of her sister’s arms. “I don’t care how long it takes, just give me the road.” Less than 12 hours earlier, Kathy’s 18-year old son Conor was hit by a car and suffered a life-threatening brain injury while crossing the street in downtown Chicago.
Kathy and Anne Marie navigated a fractured childhood through the eyes of a strong mother whose life example showed them how to live with gratitude and grit despite adversity. Impenetrable sisterhood was cemented by the heartbreak of losing two brothers to suicide and coordinated schedules to care for their elderly mom. They navigated life through partnership and mutual alliance.
Now, Kathy and her family were faced with a lonely and unimaginable anguish as she watched her son lay in a hospital bed with a poor chance for survival. Anne Marie had a front-row seat as Kathy opened herself to grace, searched for good despite repeated tragedy, and leaned on what she knew for sure; the presence of love in all.
Anne Marie engages every reader with honesty and vulnerability into the common space of navigating struggle with a perspective of hope. This is a story of Kathy’s unyielding determination to restore Conor to wellness; weaving a greater story of sisterhood into Kathy’s very personal quest to save her son.
Dianne Darr Couts' memoir, Things Fell Apart, but the Center Held, spans continents and cultures. It tells the story of Dianne's extraordinary childhood, rich with wonderful experiences juxtaposed with sexual, emotional and spiritual abuse. Personal and institutional betrayal would impact Dianne and her family for life, but her candid memoir also shows how unwavering love, support and courage set the stage for her to thrive in spite of it all.Dianne was born in Akron, Ohio, but her early childhood memories were made in Greenville, South Carolina. Her family returned to Akron when she was six, the year she attended first grade. The next year, Dianne's parents went overseas as missionaries and, because of that, her education continued in a quaint little town near Paris, then in the West African port city of Dakar, back to school in Akron for a year and a half, followed by boarding school in the rain forest of Guinea, West Africa. Her family returned to Akron the year Dianne was a sophomore and then she finished high school on an isolated station on the savanna of Mali, West Africa.Dianne's memoir includes stories of her adventures in all those places, but it also recounts the abuse she experienced. In the final chapters, Dianne reveals how the physical effects of that trauma followed her into adulthood. However, through all the good and bad, Dianne's gratitude shines through for the love and courage of those who defended her as a child, kept her world together and allowed her faith and resiliency to grow. Dianne graduated from the University of Akron and has a Master's Degree in the Art of Teaching from Marygrove College. She is a retired high school teacher whose career of teaching English and French spanned four decades and included teaching in private and public schools in the U.S. and abroad. Dianne and her husband Bud, who have been married for over fifty years, live in Akron, Ohio. They have three married children and seven grandchildren.Drawing on her own experience of trauma and its lasting effects, and on her years as a board member of MK Safety Net, Dianne speaks at national conferences and in churches to raise awareness of abuse in religious settings and to encourage abuse survivors on their healing journeys.
In 1996, Sheldon Kennedy rocked the insular world of Canadian hockey by announcing that his former minor-league coach, Graham James - the Hockey News 1989 Man of the Year - had sexually abused him more than 300 times. The media portrayed Kennedy as a hero for breaking the code of silence in professional hockey and bringing James to justice. The heroic myth intensified in 1998 when Kennedy announced that he was going to in-line skate from Newfoundland to British Columbia to raise awareness of sexual abuse. The skate raised over $1 million for Canadian Red Cross sexual abuse programs, and Kennedy settled in Calgary with his wife and young daughter. Anyone who has followed hockey in the last ten years is familiar with the story of ex-NHL player Sheldon Kennedy. As one of the most promising hockey talents to emerge from the Canadian minor leagues in the last two decades, Kennedy was destined for hockey greatness. But after he was drafted by the Detroit Red Wings in 1988, he attracted more attention for his off-ice antics than for his contributions to the score sheet. Plagued by rumours of drug and alcohol abuse and a string of injuries, Kennedy drifted from team to team. The happy ending promised by the headlines never materialized. Still haunted by the demons of sexual abuse, Kennedy's life spiralled out of control. Now he has finally come forward to tell his story, and the story of coach Graham James, who is out of prison and currently coaching hockey in Europe.
A mountain. A blizzard. A young man new to hiking and to love, making mistakes in both. First year of college is a great time to re-invent yourself. Nathan Bartlett takes the opportunity very seriously—maybe a little too seriously. And he makes mistakes. His mistakes? Falling for a straight guy who reminds him of his beloved older brother. Getting too invested in the substance abuse disorders of two other students. And climbing a mountain in a snowstorm for all the wrong reasons.But he also develops friendships that will be his for life. He faces his inner demons and comes up with a plan. And he realizes that answers to important questions are seldom waiting on the surface but must be worked for, or struggled for, or suffered for—and sometimes all three.Nathan is a trailblazer on his own journey. His success will be measured not by how well he follows someone else's path, but by whether he can forge his own. This first book in a series of three novels gets Nathan started on a journey that will teach him about himself, about life, and about love.Walk with him.
You can't stand in light while sheltering in the Darkness. Step out of Darkness and into Light!
Pain. Fear. Shame. They all thrive in darkness, in unpredictability, in loneliness, and in feeling friendless or unloved. Where are these voices? In your head! They say things like, "you are not enough, or you are too much." Darkness feeds them because they are hidden deep within you. They are like a black hole sucking all your energy and robbing your light from shining.
Are you tired of walking around in a darkened state of mind never changing? Are you satisfied with sheltering in the darkness? Is there something you are hoping for? Are you wanting to come out of the darkness to find light? If you're feeling trapped by the voice in your head? it's NOT too late to come Out of Darkness and into freedom! It won't be easy. Pain, fear, and shame will all take an emotional, physical, and mental stand against you. But don't give up! You are not alone in this battle.
"Out of Darkness" is a parallel companion book to "Pinpoints of Light: Escaping the Abyss of Abuse." It is April Tribe Giauque's journey of her life, what she learned in abuse, what she learned after the abuse, and how to never fall back into abuse (self-inflicted or otherwise).
April Tribe Giauque shows you in, Out of Darkness, a powerful method to find your light. She will empower you to:
- Identify your enemy and how to defeat him. You are worth fighting for!
- Discover your self-worth and the beauty that you are. You are more than you know!
- Say YES to loving yourself.
Deep breath. Be brave. She is in the pages of the book and will walk the journey with you to find, fuel, and live in your light! You are worth it!
Mental illness. Addiction. Pain. Fear. Control. Abuse. What images do those words stir in your mind’s eye? For me, those words paint a darkening abyss filled with millions of gallons of heaviness, guilt, and duty trapping me in tangible darkness. My former spouse could not see us or find us because he was locked away in his own mind of mental illness, then became trapped by substance abuse, and would strike out in forms of Domestic Violence. He had suffered painful experiences in his childhood, and that pain warped and twisted his mind and awakened the genetic mental illness that runs in his family. I share the stories as he told them to me: sometimes during drunken depressed states and other times with sober clarity, to give background. I describe abuse in two ways: the hunter and the caged animal. Both ultimately have control as the foundation. His mental illness was awakened from his pain, and as stress was added to it, he needed to control everything. How? As a caged animal strikes out at anyone to free itself; others are damaged in that process. In nine years of marriage, we went through various stages; incredible rays of the sun, to dimming light, to growing darkness, to finally inky blackness of the abyss of abuse. Why do I share this story? I write it for the victim. Why? Because there is more than hope, there is light, and I want you to know that you have worth within you more than you can ever know.I am an author, speaker, and life strengthening coach who helps the battered, beaten, and broken discover their strength to heal so that they become a victor in the light! My story is what I learned as I descended into this dark abyss and how I found pinpoints of light that led me back out of it. Now I am a Beacon of Light to others! The events that occurred will be told in the most accurate way I can: from my journals.It brings me hope to know this book will give each reader an opportunity to learn the processes I used when escaping my abyss of abuse. My clients, their advocates, and the supporters deepen their value and their self-worth because they learn that they have light within them and that they are WORTH it!
For millions of men on the path to recovery, Victims No Longer is the next step.
The first book written specifically for men, Victims No Longer examines the changing cultural attitudes toward male survivors of incest and other sexual trauma. Now, in this Second Edition, this invaluable resource continues to offer compassionate and practical advice, supported by personal anecdotes and statements of male survivors. Victims No Longer helps survivors to:
Psychotherapist Mike Lew has worked with thousands of men and women in their healing from the effects of childhood sexual abuse, rape, physical violence, emotional abuse, and neglect. The development of strategies for recovery from incest and other abuse, particularly for men, has been a major focus of his work as a counselor and group leader.
Thoroughly updated and revised, and including an expanded Resources section, Victims No Longer educates survivors and professionals about the recovery process - speaking to the pain, needs, fears, and hopes of the adult male survivor.
Asserting that creative expression is the natural direction of life, noted Hollywood screenwriter and director Julia Cameron presents an exciting method for artists to recover their creativity from limiting beliefs, self-sabotage, inattention, fear, jealousy, guilt, addictions, and other forces that inhibit the creative process.
It's no wonder that The Power of Now has sold over 2 million copies worldwide and has been translated into over 30 foreign languages. Much more than simple principles and platitudes, the book takes readers on an inspiring spiritual journey to find their true and deepest self and reach the ultimate in personal growth and spirituality: the discovery of truth and light.
In the first chapter, Tolle introduces readers to enlightenment and its natural enemy, the mind. He awakens readers to their role as a creator of pain and shows them how to have a pain-free identity by living fully in the present. The journey is thrilling, and along the way, the author shows how to connect to the indestructible essence of our Being, "the eternal, ever-present One Life beyond the myriad forms of life that are subject to birth and death."
Picture yourself trapped in a traffic jam feeling utterly calm. Imagine being unflappable and relaxed when your supervisor loses her temper. What if you were peaceful instead of anxious? What if your life were filled with nurturing relationships and a warm sense of belonging? This is what it feels like when you’ve achieved emotional freedom.
National bestselling author Dr. Judith Orloff invites you to take a remarkable journey, one that leads to happiness and serenity, and a place where you can gain mastery over the negativity that pervades daily life. No matter how stressed you currently feel, the time for positive change is now. You possess the ability to liberate yourself from depression, anger, and fear.
Synthesizing neuroscience, intuitive medicine, psychology, and subtle energy techniques, Dr. Orloff maps the elegant relationships between our minds, bodies, spirits, and environments. With humor and compassion, she shows you how to identify the most powerful negative emotions and how to transform them into hope, kindness, and courage. Compelling patient case studies and stories from her online community, her workshop participants, and her own private life illustrate the simple, easy-to-follow action steps that you can take to cope with emotional vampires, disappointments, and rejection.
Emotional Freedom is a road map for those who are stressed out, discouraged, or overwhelmed as well as for those who are in a good emotional place but want to feel even better. As Dr. Orloff shows, each day presents opportunities for us to be heroes in our own lives: to turn away from negativity, react constructively, and seize command of any situation. Complete emotional freedom is within your grasp.
#1 New York Times Bestseller
What would it be like to free yourself from limitations and soar beyond your boundaries? What can you do each day to discover inner peace and serenity? The Untethered Soul offers simple yet profound answers to these questions.
Whether this is your first exploration of inner space, or you’ve devoted your life to the inward journey, this book will transform your relationship with yourself and the world around you. You’ll discover what you can do to put an end to the habitual thoughts and emotions that limit your consciousness. By tapping into traditions of meditation and mindfulness, author and spiritual teacher Michael A. Singer shows how the development of consciousness can enable us all to dwell in the present moment and let go of painful thoughts and memories that keep us from achieving happiness and self-realization.
Copublished with the Institute of Noetic Sciences (IONS) TheUntethered Soul begins by walking you through your relationship with your thoughts and emotions, helping you uncover the source and fluctuations of your inner energy. It then delves into what you can do to free yourself from the habitual thoughts, emotions, and energy patterns that limit your consciousness. Finally, with perfect clarity, this book opens the door to a life lived in the freedom of your innermost being.
The Untethered Soul has already touched the lives of more than a million readers, and is available in a special hardcover gift edition with ribbon bookmark—the perfect gift for yourself, a loved one, or anyone who wants a keepsake edition of this remarkable book.
Visit www.untetheredsoul.com for more information.
Discover the benefits of being positive.
We all have two dogs inside of us. One dog is positive, happy, optimistic, and hopeful. The other dog is negative, mad, sad, pessimistic, and fearful. These two dogs often fight inside us, but guess who wins the fight? The one you feed the most. So begins the story about a negative mutt named Matt and a big dog named Bubba who teaches him how to feed himself with positivity each day and in the process Matt transforms his own life and the shelter they call home.
The Positive Dog is an inspiring, heartwarming story that not only reveals the strategies and benefits of being positive but also an essential truth for humans: Being positive doesn't just make you better. It makes everyone around you better.
Offers adult male victims of child abuse a procedure for facilitating the recovery process, and suggests ways to break the cycle of violence.